Tuesday, May 29, 2012

do u

Man of Few Words says: "wanna suck me off right now hmu."

Ummmm.... No.


http://littlerock.craigslist.org/m4w/3043923533.html

Monday, May 28, 2012

Wishing to breed with Native American Woman

Well, this may be surprising to you but most women (yes, even the ones willing to make babies with strangers on Craigslist) don't like to think of making babies as "breeding". Breeding is a term usually reserved for describing the way domestic animals get it on, not people. 


Wishing to Breed says: "Mine is Swedish/Irish - Cherokee/Choktaw blood. There is still time to make some beautiful babies. For the future. Advanced breeds will rule."
  
Judging by your picture you are more Irish than not, but like a lot of the other people living in this country you are really just a European mutt. Not saying we agree with the stereotypes, but Irish has never been on the "Advanced Breeds" list. Ever. 

In case we haven't said this enough on Studs of CL.... "Breeding" with strangers is a bad idea. Please refer to our previous post on the subject CLICK HERE .


Wishing to Breed's ad was submitted to Studs of Craiglist by a reader. Thank you! Reader submissions are greatly appreciated.

http://wyoming.craigslist.org/m4w/3003701440.html

Sunday, May 20, 2012

Decided to procreate? Anyone want to get pregnant - m4w - 27

 It's been a while since we've seen a baby maker on Studs of CL.

Baby Maker says: "I posted this ad before and received only one real response from a female asking if I was real. Yes I am real! Also as a side note, I suspect this ad will get a lot of creepy gay guys replying with some breeding fetish. So to avoid this, I ask that you be willing to talk on the phone early on. I just want to make sure you are real and sane :) First we can email about logistics, who wants to keep the baby, some info about ourselves, then talk from there.

Hi! I took a trip over the summer and almost got into a head on collision and realized I could easily die without having kids....I figure I could donate sperm/have some amazing sex to a woman or couple that needs this and have some off spring should an accident happen (Or here's a crazy idea... You could get into a meaningful, long lasting relationship, and procreate after spending an appropriate amount of time getting to know each other! Thus, skipping the whole weird making babies with strangers on Craigslist thing you've got going on here.). Alas I am 27, professional and can get any testing you want!

Thanks for Reading!

ps-I have posted before without luck and obviously finding the right person for this will take time so I can wait."

Well, unless you get struck by lightening, run over by a bus, gnawed to death by rats, or something of that nature.... Then you probably wouldn't be able to wait.






 Like how he added some extra length on there.

http://boston.craigslist.org/gbs/m4w/3012787263.html

Friday, May 18, 2012

free free free and me me me hot to trot and why not give it a shot

Hot to Trot says: "Seeking single female!!!!

Well, I know you have a heart beat. Are there a few brain cells floating in the bowl too...

I am a Single White Male- Clean cut, not drugs (Glad you are not drugs. The last guy we dated was meth. Sure you can imagine the problems that caused.), athletic, blondish, blue, 5'12", seeking same- (Hey there. Ummm... you are 6' tall. 12"= 1'. Or was that a test of our intelligence?)

And all I get out of this so far is one friend and 256 spam and a few bots, oh and one drag queen. Throw me a bone!!!!!!!!!!!! (Sure the drag queen would be much obliged.)

I am interested in a woman between 23 and 43 who is intelligent, fun, entertaining, Kind,
Compassionate, and wants to dress up, hang out for an eventing! (Eventing! Love eventings! Jeez...) Clean/ no baggage/ healthy life style/ alive (The dead must be feeling so dejected.)
Tell me the Seattle landmarks and I will:::: 1. know it is not spam.. 2. Be impressed ha ha ha 3. Door #3 is a gift! (if you are selected) (Is it herpes?)
Be beautiful Inside and Out! Typically I am attracted to Brunettes. But I am open to all races (Believe most, if not all, races can be brunette.). And if I blow into your ear and you  say thank you for the re fill - Just forgetta bout it." (Fffffffff Fffffffffff Ffffffff. You're welcome.)

 http://seattle.craigslist.org/see/m4w/3015002154.html

soft quilled dork-upine wanted

Mellow Vertebrate says: "Hiya . been a ticky year for me so far (You have ticks? That's kind of gross.) . 4 . all plucked and flushed. How are you? (Still a little grossed out by your tick problem.)

I am a quiet , mellow vertebrate. I'm not chimey or fabulous. I'm in stock and on the shelf. go ahead and scan me. I'm clearance! How are you ? (We love a good deal and shop the clearance rack for clothes and shoes. Ya know, that sort of thing. Not sure we want any men from the clearance section, though....)

I'd like to spend occassional time with a pretty and kind woman. I'm looking for lifestyle, personality, behavioral similarities , and some superficial cosmetic appeal (chemistry ). How are you? (Wondering why you keep asking how we are and if this is something you do in person...)

I enjoy quietude, nature, music and poetry.

I abhor materialism , yammering , cruelty , and ego-stank (Don't think anyone likes stank anything.). How are you? (Fine. Thank you for asking. How are you? Did you take your medicine today?)

anyway , I'm real . cool, calm & collected . funny , but not whacky. hate whacky! but love quirky ... if you are Q , not W , you'll get the diff (How about neither. Where's that option? Pie, please.).

if interested , send pic & write something about local area please. like ... Agava on Pine Street ??? woulda preferred a White Castle .... maybe, not sure.

Cheers"



Mellow Vertebrate's ad was submitted by a reader. Thank you! 
Reader submissions are always appreciated!

http://ithaca.craigslist.org/m4w/3017196065.html

Tuesday, May 15, 2012

Enjoy Your Aids

Lurker says: "Been lurking again on CL and notice some things just never change. I'll start with the guys this time, what you do in your personal life is your business BUT when you put it out in the open don't expect everyone to approve. First you have the men looking for "straight guys only" to come over for a little swordplay. Alright let me make something clear, if a dude has sex with another dude that makes him gay (Yea...straight/hetero usually means you don't play swords with your penis. That is correct.). You can call it what you want but just cause the guy you are fucking has a dress on doesn't make it any less gay, you can call it "down low" or w/e but I mean no point hiding it, you like fucking guys what's the big deal? Now I'm not gay myself but no point pretending being something you aren't I mean it's 2012 jesus christ guys stop pretending.

Alright alright fine, now don't think you ladies are off the hook. So many of these "gold digging" women want young military guys but if I recall the Army's pay scale correctly, people in the military actually get paid LESS then civilians but have to work more (This is correct.). I got buddies in the military I got no problem with the military, but just some of the ads I read of the women make me down right sad.
"My husband is away let's play" like really wtf lady (Maybe we need to start reading those ads...)? Weren't you just on here a few years ago looking to marry a military guy? Now you want to cheat on him when he's at work or deployed..but guess what! Jokes on both of you because when he is at work and you are fucking some stranger in your marital bed, he's out on the down low crossing swords with Tyrona in his new pink dress. THUG LIFE. (For real.)

Anyway to both parties enjoy your aids."

Ahhh.... Fayetteville, such a special place with its bounty of tranny hookers on Bragg Blvd (in case you'd like to know where to find them).

 http://fayetteville.craigslist.org/m4w/3016136080.html

Wednesday, May 9, 2012

My kids need a mommy

First, meet the kids!



"maaaaa" 

That's goat for "Hi, kids!" or something like that....

Goat Dad says: "As you can see I have a lot of kids and they need a mommy." 

Uh huh.

Now, let's meet this dashing fellow.


 "Ahhhhh!" 

Which of course means "My, your charming good looks are startling." or something like that...

Goat Dad also says: "I still live with my parents (Why is that not surprising?) and hope that is not a problem because the 20 acres we live on will be all mine some day. Don't get me wrong I take care of myself, no one makes my bed or does my laundry or fixes my meals except me (You can wipe  your own ass. That's great, but how about money, car, and other adult-like aspects of life?), I am very self reliant. I am looking for a relationship (He can't have those goats growing up motherless. No telling what kind of heathens they'll turn out to be.) ."


 http://boise.craigslist.org/m4w/3003825585.html

fat ugly guys need love too

Fat Ugly Guy says: "if you are big small ugly cute i would love a blow job give and recive plz cum over and have fun (...with his penis in your mouth.) 300 6'1"

Boy, that sounds enticing! Almost as much fun as poking our eyes out with sticks...

 

 http://boise.craigslist.org/m4w/3004765267.html

Friday, May 4, 2012

White guy looking for black woman - 40

White Guy says: "Hi Im a tall white country boy looking for a nice black woman. This is not my first time so im cool"





 http://charleston.craigslist.org/m4w/2964872462.html

Wednesday, May 2, 2012

back in the game - 23

Trash Collector says: "I like to hunt, fish and do pretty much anything outdoors.... I am easy to get along with, have fun in small groups of people hanging out doing whatever.. I drink on occasion but not all the time.. I like to smoke bud, and I used to do heavy drugs. Days long past me now. My kids changed my whole perspective on life. I like pretty much all music as long as it has a good beat and a solid message....I love animals I just cant have any where I live. :( sad day. I am divorced now I have two beautiful children that do not live with me unfortunately but I do take my opportunity to see them when I can... Kinda lost trust in women but I'm hoping I can find someone that can change that for me... I just wanna meet some new people and see where things go...Iv had enough "casual" encounters I suppose and I want to meet someone that can I can call mine and she calls me hers. If you're interested please get at me... With summer coming up work schedule is tight and my funds are not always the greatest but I can make a trip if its only a little more than an hour one way and still be able to take you on a date. See what happens"



See all that trash back there? Yea, where your dining table use to be. There's this can outside where it goes. If you just walk like maybe 10 or 12 feet more past the table to your front door...you'll probably find it out there somewhere. We know how heavy drug use and smoking bud can make people kind of forgetful. Just thought we'd help out.



 http://rapidcity.craigslist.org/m4w/2964784153.html