im drug free - 23

...this morning.
 

Stephen says: "im stephen and im drug free and im look for some one who is a good women who need a drug free guy im a good guy and i well do thing u need me to do so if u are look for that a drug free guy who well be good to u email me"

Questions to ask: For how long have you been drug free? Is this a commitment thing, or will you stop being drug free when your connection reups?

 http://mobile.craigslist.org/m4w/3570497247.html

Ladies:lets make a baby. Sperm donor or responsible baby daddy4you

 Starting to think Craigslist really does need to make a new section in the personal ads for sperm donors. Maybe someone, somewhere is looking for a good deal on baby making juice.

Baby Daddy4you says: "White guy here 37yrs old and looking for a woman who would like to have a baby but has either not met a willing man or does not want a man in her life. I would prefer to assist the child's mother and be active in the child's life and help out both financially with child support as well as in all ways in which a father should help. I would expect to trust and be friends and co-parents with the child's mother so there would be no need for baby momma/daddy drama, jealousy, paternity tests, or other childish games since we are adults. Also, if the woman strictly wants a sperm donation and nothing else from the father then I would be open to helping with that as well and it could be through either sex or at home insemination. Drug and disease free here and looking for the same and someone who is serious. This would be something that obviously I would want the woman to be comfortable with so I would be open to agreeing with her terms upfront, in writing and in front of notary if she chooses. If interested, please put the name of your county in the subject block of your reply."

Here are some of our older Sperm Donor posts:

ANY GIRL WANT TO GET PREGNANT? 

Want to get pregnant?

Decided to procreate. Anyone want to get pregnant?


And here's an article about Craigslist sperm donation gone wrong: 

Craigslist Sperm Donor Forced to Pay Child Support

Can't say this enough, "Don't give sperm to strangers!" 

Some Friendly Advice from Studs of CL 

http://dothan.craigslist.org/m4w/3550025620.html

 

Elvis needs a naughty helper!

Elvis says: "Elvis needs a naughty helper this Christmas season! Are there any naughty college girls or ladies who think they still look like college girls for some naughty photo shoots and possibly more? Send your face and naughty pics, along with your number, and tell Elvis why you should be in his photo shoot!"

"Elvis" needs a better Elvis get-up and to spend some time working on his pecs. 

That's not a banana in his pocket. He's happy to see you. 

 http://auburn.craigslist.org/m4w/3485868091.html

Jogging partner - 30

Did you miss out on that last community service project we posted? Need to get a few hours in? Good samaritan? Like to do your bit to make the world a better place? Or maybe after kicking Gigalo's ass for wasting your sweet time with his nonsense? Whatever the reason, we've got you covered!

Not a Jogger says: "Hello Ladies! I am a 30yo swm looking for a really cool girl that is looking for a jogging partner. I wanna take off like 25lbs and I am not a jogger, maybe you can motivate me:) (With your vagina.)
It would be nice for a fwb relationship to develop and we can burn some additional calories after our hot sweaty runs. (Ewww.) My pic is attached and im like 15lbs heavier than i was in this pic.. put runner girl in the subject line so I know its legit:) Smooches
Hit me up, I cant wait to hear from you! (Have a feeling you'll be waiting a while.)" 

 http://charleston.craigslist.org/m4w/3542008284.html

Searching for you..... - 35

"Donna" says: "Attention ladies!!!!!! I am searching for 10 ladies 21-45 (all shapes, sizes and ethnic groups) to help me show my roomate/ bestfriend/ fb a great time and to make this his best birthday present ever!!! 36th birthday Celebration to start on Feb 8 at 7:00 pm til? His birthday is actually the 11th of Feb.

We will take him out dancing downtown...... (if you don't drink that's ok cuz I will need a couple designated drivers if can't get limo). Afterward we will bring the party back to my home on James Island where we will be dressing up like belly dancers and dance around him like his harem...... give him a massage from head to toe, (YOU DO NOT HAVE SEX WITH HIM) (Alright, now assuming this is genuinely Donna searching for these women and not Bday boy himself... you intend to have a bunch of women dance around this man in skimpy outfits, rub him down, and NOT have sex with him? Best bday ever how exactly? Sounds craptastic, if that's actually what is going on here. "Here, friend. I have brought you beautiful naked women who will not sleep with you. Happy birthday!" That's like a bad dream you're happy to wake up from.)We will model for him in different outfits...... ie... evening gown, swimsuit, lingerie, sexy costumes, etc...... (Lingerie! It keeps getting better... Guessing Donna doesn't actually like Bday boy.)

You each will be given a T-shirt to take home tooo! Hopefully we will be wearig these in the hot tub...... (Ooooh! A T-shirt? And I was just wondering what was in it for me??) There will be plenty of food and drinks as well. All I ask is that when we go outdancig you dance with HIM and each other not other guys, this is HIS night, TREAT him like a king! Don't get too drunk that you throw up or pass out (You sure know how to rain on a person's parade.). You don't have to stay the whole weekend but I do have plenty of room to crash if you want.

If you wanna have fun and you're interested, please email pic and your phone #. Put KING in subject line so I know you are real.

YOU MUST BE SINGLE!!!!!!!

Thanks,
Donna

PS... He loves RED HIGH HEELS!"

What do you think? Was this Donna's bad idea or Bday boy being lame? Perhaps a combination of both. 

Here's a pic in the event you have a pair of red heels you've been itchin' to wear and want to "crash" at a complete stranger's house in your complimentary wet T-shirt...

 

http://charleston.craigslist.org/m4w/3542687707.html

 

Looking for love - 35

He's sexy and he knows it.

http://portland.craigslist.org/clk/m4w/3513750609.html

A hunk for any age

A hunk of weirdness, that is. 

On a positive note you could share earrings with him and he could help you with shaving your eyebrows, or something... 

A Hunk says: " Hi

I'm sick of typing these, I'm TOP CLASS for any aged white slender woman who is decent looking, please write... come to my place, it's a music studio and an upscale house and hood... very...

i'm very cool, and good at doing you (That's presumptuous.)... making you feel comfy, as well as very full (Uh huh...)

I'm a programmer, 6 ft, 200 pnds, fit, jog, work at home on computer programming mostly, also music, video, successful, educated, clean.. educated in love and woman, and life and class, all over the world (Whatever you want to hear to get into your pants. That's what he means.)

write to me, please !!!!!!!!!!!"

Think him and Nut Sniffer should get together. They look like they'd hit it off. 

 http://portland.craigslist.org/wsc/m4w/3527647738.html

*Page contains nudity. Click on link at one's own discretion*